Call me Kulwinder...please

All Punjabi names have deep meaning, purpose
Ken (Kulwinder) Herar, The Times Published: Tuesday, August 18, 2009

I have been struggling with this "identity issue" for decades. I finally decided to come out of the closet and set the record straight - for as crazy as this sounds, it's my name.
Since I was a toddler and went to school, I was known as "Ken" or "Kenny" - both fabulous English names. Obviously I didn't have a choice at birth!
I come from a generation where parents wanted their children to have English nicknames rather than traditional Indian names.
The main reason, honestly, is that many names are just difficult to pronounce for English-speaking folks. They also wanted their children to feel accepted and not teased at school. A major sacrifice to make just to feel part of a western society.
Sure, I have been ridiculed by friends like, "where's your Barbie doll, Ken?" Or, referred to as the Irish beer "Kilkenny."
And if I am not mistaken, there is a T-shirt that reads, "I killed Kenny." I sympathize with all the Kennys and Kens out there.
For the longest time, I didn't like people referring to me by my traditional Indian name, which was given to me by my grandparents. Only a few close people know my real name.
When I was surfing through my legal documents, passports, birth certificate and driver's licence, one thing became very clear: I am legally known as someone else!
This internal struggle on who I am "pretending" to be and who I really am is going to have some closure.
For years, I was ashamed of my traditional Indian name and ran away from my real identity. I have come to the realization you don't have to change your name to be part of an "inclusive Canada."
My name defines my soul and my heritage and nothing can ever replace that. Even when people say, "you need to be Canadian."
The funny thing is many of us already have changed our names. I respect people who keep their vibrant traditional names in Canada.
I know one thing, if my parents stayed in India, I wouldn't have imagined having a name like Ken.
Are you ready to hear my real name? A little drum roll, please. My Punjabi name is Kulwinder. Isn't that a beautiful name? I like it and it's universal. Males and females can share this name.
In the Punjabi culture when children are born the first initial is picked by the Guru Granth Sahib (Sikh Scriptures), which has 1,430 pages.
The holy priest closes the scriptures and then opens it and the first initial that appears on the left page is the beginning of the newborn's name.
From there the family decides on what the name should be.
My initial came up as the letter "K." Not all Sikh families practise this formula. As I discovered, there is deep meaning to Punjabi names and a purpose.
For example, Kulwinder is broken into two separate meanings as described by a friend. "Kul" means family or ancestry. "Winder" refers to a shining star.
I encourage people to call me Ken or Kulwinder. I will not be offended by either. But, just not "Kenny," please. It's too boyish for me.
If you look closely I have added both names into my introductory head as a reminder of our diversity. Let's celebrate what has been given or passed down to us!
KenHerar@gmail.com